Contributed by Adeline Ting • May 30, 2023
Once a parent, always a parent. And once a child, always a child. No matter the age.
As parents, my husband and I have always attempted our level best to encourage and impart Christian living values to our kiddo, with varying degrees of success (to be honest!). We did what most Christian parents will do, starting off on the simple ABCs of Christian living such as saying grace before meals, reading Bible stories, going to God in prayer for healing when sick, trusting in God and praying for good exam results. As kiddo grows up, it becomes more challenging to integrate Christian values as he questions why some prayers are not answered. He constantly battles with distractions that robs his time from God and threatens to take him away from his core values too. As parents, we evolve too, so as to meet his growing needs. We tag-team our parental roles as nurturer, provider, manager, disciplinarian, and spiritual educator, to continue to guide kiddo. We embody a life that worships God by giving thanks in gratitude for all that God has blessed us with. We often praise God in whatever circumstances, to impart on kiddo that God is real and is with us no matter the situation. We serve God in our different capacities, and encourage kiddo to do the same, and are thankful for his involvement in Christmas productions and children’s choir. We have open conversations with kiddo and allow him to grow and make mistakes so that through these experiences, we convey to him that he will always have our unwavering acceptance, affection, and affirmation. In short, we are teaching kiddo that the life we live must reflect our gratitude to God.
As I ponder on my own experience as a child, I realised that a lot of what I have learnt was inculcated from my parents. My parents back then were converts and were very shy to share their biblical knowledge with us children. But they educated us differently and powerfully – in their serving, values and how they lead their life. As a child, I witnessed how my mother, with the little that she had, has always opened our house to host CG meetings and prepared the fellowship meals that follow. I recognized her big compassionate heart to mother others (my cousins) and how she always looked after them and visited them while they studied away from their home. I remembered how she continuously lived a life that is kind and trusting. And when my mother was diagnosed with cancer, she spent her last days praising God and seeking Him and was prepared to accept His will. And when my mother passed, my father lost his only life-companion and soulmate. But he was at peace, and never once blamed God. Such was their trust and love for God that they were able to accept and move on in life, remaining steadfast and grounded in His love.
As I try to connect the dots, I realise that my role as a parent and as a child has no ending, no matter my age. I pray that God’s wisdom be with my husband and I, as we parent our kiddo. And I ask for God’s grace too that I remain a good child to my father and that God continues to bless our relationship. As I was about to end my reflection, I looked over to my introverted teenage kiddo sitting beside me, and I asked him what tagline or core values that he could identify with in this family.
He replied nonchalantly : “Don’t lose yourself. Never give up and always trust God. If things don’t work out, that’s because it is not part of God’s plan”.
I shed a tear of gratitude as I signed off.
