Posted by May Ng • Feb 28, 2022
Surrender has not been easy for me. To me, surrendering means conceding defeat and giving up. The little control freak in me doesn’t usually want people telling me what to do – I want to be in control. But, the more I want to be in control, the more afraid I am of losing control. This ties me down in bondage, in a vicious cycle of fear and anxiety.
This week’s sermon has brought it out to plain sight, that through surrender, victory beckons. I believe I will never be truly free until I have fully surrendered to God.
Surrendering to the Lord doesn’t consist of only major issues. While large matters do matter, it’s the tiny little things that can wreak havoc too. I recall a time when I got into a slight altercation with a friend, who refused to divulge the contact of a pineapple cookie baker. I am not sure why such info was withheld, but the conversation turned ugly because I insisted on knowing that piece of information. I have since learnt that this is not something worth arguing over. I committed the matter to God, and somehow, I will find out what I needed to know in the following days, be it through casual browsing of social media, being gifted the same, etc. This has happened many times over the years. God is truly faithful, and He does grant the desires of your heart! He will arrange circumstances in order to reveal Himself to you!
I confess that there are certain areas in my life where it is easier to surrender (read: casting my pineapple cookie crown to the Lord), while in other areas, I find it hard to let go. As people in my circles would know, my husband and I have been trying to expand our family of two for quite awhile now, but to no avail yet. Much resources have been channeled towards this end, and I prayerfully sought the Lord before each cycle of treatment. I do wonder sometimes if my actions are in harmony with God’s plan at all. This situation torments me, and through this week’s sermon, I know God is telling me to surrender to Him. The sooner I do this, the sooner I will experience the peace and freedom that can come only from Christ.
Most people’s understanding of victory may not necessarily be in sync with God’s idea of the same. Victory may seem like winning over a major client, securing a multi-million dollar deal, purchasing that shiny new ride, moving into a bigger abode, being cured completely, having more children, etc. While these could be in line with what God has in mind for us to His glory, the Lord also reminded in Isaiah 55:8, that ‘His thoughts are not my thoughts, nor my ways His ways.’ Not all victories are tangible – freedom in Christ, overcoming strongholds and having God’s lasting peace are some examples of victories too! God is always good, and I need to ‘trust the Lord with all of my heart and lean not on my own understanding’ (Proverbs 3:5).
In many ways, surrender is an act of trust, obedience, humility and faith. Resisting God will be costly to my well-being in every area, but more critical than that, I would be out of line from God’s will for my life.
But does surrender mean losing hope, and doing nothing at all in despair? Of course not. Surrendering to Christ is not about sitting back and letting God do all of the work. I believe God wants us to be in a constant, unceasing communion with Him. This is where prayer and reading His Word comes in. My circumstances may not immediately change, but as I continue to seek Him, I know He will change my heart and my desires. I have also felt God nudging and prompting me every now and then, to be responsible and take ownership for my choices and actions too. I need to be sensitive to the leading of the Holy Spirit in my pursuits.
I know I need to let go, and let God in. He is omniscient, omnipotent and omnipresent. True freedom is found when I know Who I am surrendering to. The more I relinquish to Him, the more He assures me that He always has my best interests at heart. Jesus promised in Romans 8:32 that ‘He who did not spare His own Son, but delivered Him up for us all, how shall He not with Him also freely give us all things?’ Jesus is victorious when He surrendered His life for me, and is victorious when He was raised again. Jesus is worthy of being surrendered to because of Who He is and what He has done. Jesus is eternally worthy of all my faith, trust and hope.